No Self Control

Does a dog have any self control? That’s a good question and I’m not sure if I know the answer.

Let’s examine food in relation to self control. I’m pretty well-behaved, so they tell me. I’ve seen other dogs constantly scrounging for food and I don’t do that. I would if I could, but the scrounger has been trained out of me by my family. Another training technique they used was making me wait for my meals. Oh, the sweet torture! Shoes on the Floor would give me the command to sit, put food in my bowl and make me wait about fifteen excruciating seconds (full of drool, need and want) before saying the magic word, “Okay.”

I guess that training has set me up to behave pretty well around food. Doesn’t mean I’m not opportunistic… read on, my sisters.

A-Dog used to do a lot of baking B.C. and I was not much interested in the end result. Although that chocolate smell is dee-vine! In the baking process, sometimes it makes sense to bring butter to room temperature, which means it needs to sit out for a couple hours. And in that couple hours, I may catch a whiff of said butter about 1,874 times. I don’t think it’s a question of self control when there is torture involved.

The score? Scout the Dog 2 — Sticks of Butter 0.

Then there was the Onion Kulcha – oy! Unfortunately, onions are toxic for dogs. But I am a self-confessed bread hound. Love the stuff. I find it hard to resist under regular circumstances, but the fragrant Indian bread, makes my nose dance. Left unattended, I made that flat loaf all mine. The confusion and panic that ensued may have been funny, if not for the call to Doggie Poison Control and the words induce vomiting. I’ll spare you the details, but “better in than out” has a whole new meaning for me now.

I guess from these examples of behavior that self control is a human trait and we dogs still rely on instinct. Makes us charming and disarming, yes? And that photo above? I had just eaten a sandwich off the counter. Will they never learn?

The Dog List

Oh, you humans. I hadn’t had a proper walk in three days because of your To Do lists and fretting over what you haven’t accomplished. Maybe A-Dog realized how silly she was acting, because we finally got to see the sun today. Not just through the window. Outside!

To help you humans out, in your cushy, worrisome lives, here IT is.

The Dog List:

1. Feed me
2. Walk me
3. Give me a place to do my business
4. Give me a place to sleep
5. Repeat

Granted, you have to do these things for us, but that’s how you set it up ages ago. The key is… that little list keeps us happy & satisfied. Can you dig it?

This Tail is Hitting the Trail

I love when the humans want to be fit! We have been hiking daily for the past couple weeks and I AM LOVING IT! A-Dog usually finds a trail where I can be free from my leash and my nose can do what it yearns to do. The hikes have been snowy and long and sunny and cold. All so very good!

I don’t enjoy being photographed, as evidenced above. But I did want to share some photos from one trail we hike. It’s so bizarre, but this vehicle is right in the middle of the woods. No road, no path, just smack dab in the middle of the forest.




Humans are just odd… but we love them anyway.

I’ve just been given the high sign that we’re off for another one, yea! Smell ya later :)

Pack Order – Scout Sandwich Anyone?

Humans don’t get it. When you sit or lay on the floor, you are now in dog territory. You’re fair game to sit on and get your long overdue face bath. You are also considered to be lower in the pack order.

A-Dog rarely sits on the floor, but Shoes-on-the-Floor, Little-Feet and Preemie-Feet, all spend quality playing time there. I don’t pay attention to the little ones, until Shoes plunks himself down on the carpet. Then I am compelled to get between him and whomever he’s playing with at the time. ::see photo above :) I am illustrating our pack order here.

I am allowed to lay on the furniture and, heaven forbid, sleep on the bed. But I do follow the pack rules. When A-Dog gets in bed for the night, I get off the bed and go to my chair. When the mornings get chilly, I move from my chair to the bed, but I almost always sleep on Shoes’s side. I’m respecting my leader. Pack leaders eat first, get the best food, sleep where they want and can wither you with a look. They sound bossy, yes, but if there was no leader, guaranteed there would be mayhem.

As you can see from the photo, I consider myself to be third in line. I’m letting that little guy on the left know that he is fifth and he and Shoes should remember that fact. I’m not aggressive about it, except for the destruction of the block tower. But the tears dry and the shouts fade and I am still THIRD! Booyakasha baby!

Just Love Me

Not too much to ask. I always love you – it’s never even a question in what I call my mind.

I can do it by pretending you’re a dog. Dogs prefer dogs – that’s just a fact, jack. And in your own way, you pretend I’m human. Or at least you project human behavior onto me. And I LIKE it.

So, in my head, we’re just a pack, jack. Your big brain might say otherwise, but don’t you prefer just hanging with me to almost anything else? It’s completely the shiznit :)

2 Dogs 2000 Miles

I love to find out about a person or a pet that is sent on a journey by his or her beliefs. Brave and admirable, it makes us all want to do better with whatever we tackle.



2 Dogs 2000 Miles is a walk from Austin to Boston for all those touched by cancer. Luke Robinson began this walk in 2008 in honor of his dog, Malcolm. Malcolm was diagnosed with canine bone cancer in 2004 and struggled through his illness for almost two years. Very little was known about canine cancer and Luke wanted to take action to change that. Through the walk, Luke raises awareness about this disease and the little known fact that dogs get the same kinds of cancer that humans do. He is walking from Austin to Boston with THEE best company of two Great Pyrenees, Hudson and Murphy. You can support 2 Dogs 2000 Miles in many ways. Visit the website here for information, schedules and how to Puppy Up! You can follow their journey on Twitter here.

They will be walking in Washington, DC, this Friday, September 18. If you are in the area, why not join Hudson, Murphy and Luke to show your support. I will be taking my humans with me when 2 Dogs 2000 Miles come to Connecticut in February. I will keep you posted!

Chesapeake Bay Retriever Week – The Happy Growl

A classic dog smile… we Chessies know how to smile like that as you can see above. But did you know that we also have a Chesapeake-only “smile” that can flip out the uninitiated?

This “smile” is toothy and comes with all kinds of vocalizations, which can include a growl or two. Each Chessie has a unique “smile,” just as humans do. If you don’t know this about our breed, it could seem as if we’d like to eat you for lunch. But it’s our way of showing happiness. Even when we aren’t smiling, we can be very vocal. A deep and throaty “roo-roo-roo” means “What’s up? Where have you been? I’m so happy to see you!” It always makes the humans laugh.

I give my smile only when I have a toy in my mouth, so you don’t see my teeth, but you can hear my happy growls. Many a visitor has recoiled to these noises, but they soon see I’m just a bucket of love. I don’t have any media to show you my smile, but here’s a little clip of another Chessie showing his lovely teeth, enjoy!

Chesapeake Bay Retriever Week – Social Dog

Do you follow me? I’m @ScouttheDog on Twitter and I hang around Facebook on the RiverDog Prints page. Are you a fan?

With social media being all the rage, even dogs like me can have our own little part of the interwebs. How does that relate to being a Chessie? Roll with me homies…

My breed is fiercely loyal – we are a one family dog. We protect and love our family, whatever that may be. I’ve been raised with cats and kids, so I’ve been socialized to accept and love them. Socializing a dog means to introduce them to other dogs, animals and people. It can also mean to expose them to different social situations. When a dog is socialized, we remain calm and polite in most situations. It is essential to socialize Chesapeakes from the get-go of puppyhood. Our Chessie history has placed us with just one person, usually a hunter, and that mentality is ingrained in our independent brains.

When we meet another dog for the first time, we’ll make quick introductions (yeah, you know how we do it.) After that, it’s like the other dog doesn’t really exist. If the other dog wants to play, we’ll go along, but we’re always looking to see what our main peeps are doing. We won’t engage unless we’re the dominating kind.

Without socialization, meeting other dogs and humans can be a terrible experience. Chessies will either be excessively submissive or the completely obnoxious A-Dog. So, bring us out. Introduce us around and we’ll show you that quirky, silly and very active doggie that make humans marvel at our positive energy.

Tongues Are Not For Wagging

Ahhhrghgg. BOY am I tired. I must rest just a little. Today, and today only I will shorten my nap to a mere 11 hours. I am busy and I have things to do. I am tired because I went swimming in the river with Shoes. It was good to see him out there for a change. Lately, he’s been cooking a lot. I think that’s what they call it. That is one process which baffles me. They take stuff which smells pretty good to start with, and then they add all this other stuff to it.. heat it and take it to a whole other room. So complicated, so complex.

That’s just one of the many things that A-Dog and Shoes make so much more involved than they need to be. Grooming is another. The shower, the bath, the soap the brushing. I pity them their teensy tongues that can barely reach beyond their lips. And the tongue is so useful: greeting, eating, licking, cleaning (self), cleaning (others), cleaning (floor). It keeps you cool, it helps you drool. I can drink with it or clean stink with it. The one thing I DON’T use it for seems to be the only thing they DO use it for: Talking. They use it to create all these different sounds… again too much, too complex. I read on the Internet that one of their languages, English, has passed a million words. I know words as you’ve read here, but I only need enough words to express three thoughts:

1. I’m hungry
2. Stay away from me
3. May I smell your behind?

After that, it’s all just commentary. Now, about that nap…

Oh She’s SO Smart…

That’s what they say, my humans, Shoes-on-the-floor and A-Dog. And that’s nice. Nothing better than appreciation. Of course, I always chuckle just a bit when I hear it (tough to notice since my chuckle looks and sounds a great deal like my snot-rocket, clear out my nostrils blow, but there ya go, I’m complex like that.) I chuckle because they think that my smarts begin and end with the mundane. I open the door with my nose, they are impressed. I come downstairs every night precisely at 9:00 pm and they marvel.

In truth, and we can’t say this too loud fellow woofers, I run the show here. A few examples: The bigger one, Shoes-on-the-Floor, balances the checkbook and pays the bills. I lay on the floor beside him as he grunts and moans, breathes hard and curses. Occasionally he looks over at me and says something like, “Oh.. if you only know how good you have it…lying there.. no cares at all…” No cares at all? Yah. My first care is checking his work. He gets up and goes upstairs and I check his math. Once he added the mortgage payment to the balance instead of subtracting it. Another time, he backed up his books to the ‘H’ drive.. we don’t even have and ‘H’ drive! And that isn’t even the half of it…

They never wonder how the piano stays in tune… or realize that they haven’t changed a light bulb since 2005. I must say it is tougher now to keep them buttoned up since A-Dog spends more time at home. Used to be I could do all my work between 9 and 5 when they were away, but now I have to check out her daybook and his schedule and plan accordingly. Hey it’s nothing I can’t handle. I just have to careful and not try to do too much.

One time, I was swapping out a spark plug on the lawnmower and dropped the wrench… made a big noise and they came out to the garage and I was almost busted. Had to knock over the garbage can to make it look good. Last week I was filling out camp forms for the little ones and I couldn’t remember a phone number so I had to open Shoes-on-the-Floor’s cellphone. I changed his ring while I was there and that raised some suspicions – couldn’t take ‘Call Me’ by Blondie another minute. He thinks he’s being clever, but as much as I love him, he sometimes gives himself just a little too much credit.

So, I play it cool… help when I can, but not so much that they won’t learn enough to one day do it for themselves. Next project – how to re-tile the kitchen without them noticing….